What We Keep

I planned a Sale? I went through my house for weeks with a careful eye and really looked at everything in it. I asked questions like;

Do I have a place for this picture frame? Serving platter? Candle stick? I used to love this decorative pillow but do I still love it? Does it improve the space or just take up space?

Have we out grown this? Do we play this game anymore? We used to love this activity but do we still love it? Am I ever going to do this again or have I moved on?

Do these clothes still fit me? Are they comfortable to wear? Are they still my style? I used to wear these pants but do I still wear them? This sweater has a hole but is it worth fixing or not?

Lots of things didn't pass the test. Lots of things moved into the garage sale pile. Not into the garbage...because I believe that these things are still really good things.  Ready for a new home, a new owner...just not good for me anymore.

And then I got to thinking...

What if the people in my life received the same treatment as the things in my life. That group of people that I see when I look all around me. What if I asked the same questions of them that I ask of my things when I do the final "once over" in preparation for a garage sale?

What if I let go of the people who were just taking up space? And time?

What if I just stopped spending time with the people who were not improving my life?

What if I let go of the people who do things I no longer enjoy doing? What if I passed them along to someone else who still likes to play that game or watch that show or eat that junk?

What if I only kept the people who still fit me?

What if I let go of the ones that hurt me, or rubbed me the wrong way, or made me feel fat?

What if I took a hard look at some of the relationships in my life that have damage?

And then I thought some more...

I revealed a secret to a dear friend once and it was like a bullet hole in a favorite sweater. But this friendship is a cashmere cable knit that is worth saving. This relationship is a classic that will never go out of style and so we stitched up the hole. Some relationships are are worth saving so you put a gorgeous brooch over the hole and wear it anyway.

Other relationships...not so much.

I have a few people that I'm planning to let go of this season. Like the khaki's I bought in a rush one day purely out of convenience, some of my relationships are just about proximity...and when the pants that have little value get a grease stain on them you let them go...that's going to happen for me this year. With people. I have some relationships with huge stains on them that I can no longer ignore.

I hang around with some people that rub me the wrong way. I give space and time to people who don't improve my life and I am going to stop doing that. I struggle to be with people who behave in a way that makes me sad or uncomfortable or angry. And that is just dumb. And this year, I am going to stay away from dumb.

Like the perfectly wonderful crystal candlestick that no longer matches my decor, these are good people. They are just not good for me anymore. That candlestick was buried in a closet when it should have been out on somebody's table. I am going to let some people go and they will have more time to be with people who fit them.

This year, I am taking a good look at the people I keep. 

What if I only kept the people who still fit me?